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Why Do I Have Many Enemies? Who Are My Enemies?

  • Writer: by J. Khoo @ Mr Art of War
    by J. Khoo @ Mr Art of War
  • Jun 10
  • 5 min read

Updated: 2 days ago

Why Do I Have Many Enemies? Who Are My Enemies?
What makes an enemy?

Does everyone have enemies? My answer is yes!


We live in a world where we compete for better jobs, better pay, a promotion, more business, or even compete in chasing a girl. When you compete, you make enemies.


However, if you have many enemies, then you must ask yourself,


"Why do I have so many enemies?"


To answer why you have so many enemies, first, you have to define what makes an enemy.


It's crucial to determine who and what constitutes an enemy.


Table of Contents:



1. Who are my enemies, and what makes an enemy?


You can classify your enemy as someone who is:


1. Manipulative 

2. Talks behind your back.

3. Takes advantage.

4. Mislead

5. Opportunistic

6. Does not want to see you progress.

7. Put you in a dangerous situation that may harm you.


Very seldom would anyone do a self-reflection of who their friends and enemies are. I believe it is good to know who your friends are and who your enemies are.


The great strategist by the name of Sun Tzu, who wrote "The Art of War" 2,500 years ago, said,


Know yourself and know your enemy, and you will not fear the results of a hundred battles. 

By identifying who your enemies are and understanding why you have many of them, you can determine the root cause and find a way to avoid creating more enemies or reconcile with some.


2. Reasons why you have so many enemies


In life, it's not unusual to be surrounded by enemies, and most of the time, you do not know the reasons behind their hostility.


There is a significant possibility that your personality traits or character characteristics may be the reasons attracting many enemies, even when you are completely unaware of it.


Understanding these dynamics can be crucial in navigating social interactions and improving relationships. Here are some possible reasons why you might find yourself with many enemies:


1. Being too easygoing or too friendly attracts enemies.


When you are excessively friendly and fail to set clear boundaries, it opens the door for colleagues, acquaintances, or even so-called friends to take advantage of your kindness.


They may start asking for favors that go beyond reasonable limits, expecting you to do things for them without offering anything in return.


This pattern can lead to resentment, as you may feel exploited, while they perceive you as an easy target.


Consequently, your overly friendly demeanor can attract opportunistic individuals who seek to benefit from your good nature. Hence, creating more enemies.


2. Your Unique Name That Might Create Enemies


Consider the implications of having a name like Wildman, Dick, Gaylord, Adolf, or Osama. Each of these names carries with it a significant burden, often evoking strong reactions from others.


A name can serve as a powerful identifier, but it can also become a source of contention, leading to misunderstandings and even a hostile environment. The weight of such names often overrides a person's identity, becoming a lens through which others view you, sometimes very unfairly.


Imagine a person named Adolf. Despite being innocent and unconnected to the notorious historical figure, they may face prejudice and hostility due to their name.


This association can lead to negative assumptions about their character. Similarly, a name like Osama, which is linked with terrorism, can evoke fear and suspicion, regardless of the bearer’s true nature.


One of these types of names will create many enemies.


Another one is names like Wildman or Gaylord can lead to ridicule or mockery, perceived as humorous or absurd.


This teasing can undermine self-esteem and can occur in workplaces, in schools, or social settings.


In professional settings, a unique or controversial name might hinder respect and credibility, making it difficult to be taken seriously or advance, as colleagues may focus on the funny name over qualifications or achievements.


This can create an environment where one has to work twice as hard to prove their worth, simply to overcome the stigma associated with their name.


Ultimately, the implications of having a unique name that might create enemies are profound.


3. Celebrating Your Success Creates Enemies.


In a world where competition is often fierce, sharing your achievements can sometimes backfire.


While it may seem innocent and generous to celebrate your successes with others, this openness can inadvertently breed envy and jealousy among peers.


Those who feel threatened by your accomplishments may develop negative feelings towards you, leading to rivalry and hostility.


This can create an environment where your achievements, rather than being celebrated, become a source of contention and a hostile environment.


4. Poor Body language attracts enemies.


Your body language communicates volumes about your confidence and openness. Unfortunately, toxic individuals or bullies are adept at reading non-verbal cues.


If your body language conveys insecurity or submissiveness, it can make you a prime target for those looking to assert their dominance or vent their frustrations.


They often look out for individuals who appear vulnerable, and if you show signs of low self-esteem or hesitation, it may encourage them to direct their negativity toward you. Hence, you have a new enemy.


Paying attention to your posture, eye contact, and overall body language can help reduce this risk.


Why Do I Have Many Enemies? Who Are My Enemies?
What makes an enemy?

5. Dangers of Talking Too Much


While communication is vital in building relationships, too much talking can lead to revealing personal weaknesses or insecurities.


The more you share, the more bullets you provide for those who may wish to exploit your weakness. Additionally, talking too much can increase the likelihood of making inappropriate or offensive statements, which can offend others and create misunderstandings.


It is essential to strike a balance in conversation, ensuring that you engage meaningfully without oversharing or inadvertently offending those around you.


Sharing your goals, ideas, and dreams excessively can lead to others imitating them. As a result, you may face new competition, turning them into your enemies.


6. The more ambitious you are, the more enemies you have.


Ambition is often seen as a positive trait, driving individuals to achieve their goals and excel in their careers. However, in certain environments, particularly those with insecure leadership, your ambition can be perceived as a threat.


If you work for a boss who feels their position is at risk due to your drive and determination, they may respond with hostility or sabotage.


This dynamic can create a toxic atmosphere where your aspirations are met with resistance, leading to the development of enemies who view you as competition rather than a colleague.



3. Strategic Awareness: Managing Possible Conflicts


Enemies can be made in any situation. The dynamics of human interaction are complex, and misunderstandings or conflicts can happen unexpectedly. It's crucial to be self-aware of your actions and anticipate the reactions they might provoke.


Do a self-reflection, study who your enemy is. By identifying who your enemies are, you open up an opportunity to study how to improve your situation.


Learning to understand what motivates or drives people, as well as what provokes them, leads to making more friends or allies and fewer enemies.


You need a strategy.


Learn The Art of War from Mr. Art Of War.



Why Do I Have Many Enemies? Who Are My Enemies?
What makes an enemy?

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